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Monday, June 25, 2007

D.I.Y Time: How do I build a table?

For eons, tables have been used to rest objects on or to eat off of, or in some rare cases, both. It is with this that it gives me great pleasure to detail Do It Yourself instructions so you can have a table in the comfort of your own home.

In the broadest definition, a table is "a flat surface supported by a base." I kept this simple definition in mind when writing the step by step instructions you see before you.

1. Find a flat surface

Think of a flat surface you see everyday. It can range from being a board of plywood, the roof of your neighbor's car, or even a manhole cover.

If you are running into problems on handling step one, please reference "D.I.Y Time: How do I turn my nieghbor's car into a convertible?"

2. Find a base

Finding the proper base is limited to your imagination. You will most likely want something that has two opposite sides that are parallel. For example, imagine a plank of wood in which both ends of the plank are smooth and level, and if lines were to be drawn off the angle of those ends, they would never cross paths. Of course, wooden planks are a preposterous example. Be free to use anything you find laying around, like a nightstand or footstool.

3. Put flat surface on base horizontally

Make sure you have the flat surface from step 1 ready when you try to do this step. Once you have both the flat surface and base ready, place the flat surface on the base. If you have trouble with this, there is an old trick my dad taught me when I helped him make our kitchen table out of an old lamp and the roof of our neighbor's car. By using the setting sun and the horizon as a guide, you can tell how you are suppose to rest the flat surface on the base. For these reasons, it is best if you build in an area that has a wonderful view of the sunset. If not, try making up an old trick that fits your needs.

4. Admire your hard work!!

Congratulations! You have successfully built your very first table. Feel free to rest things on this table as you see fit and maybe, just maybe, eat off of it, too.

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