Travel Guide: Martha's Vineyard

Tucked away off the coast of Massachusetts, Martha's Vineyard has been a mainstay in cutesy tourism for the past hundred years. All of the richest people visit there because of how remote and secluded it is from the rest of the United States, and you can pretend you are rich too by checking out some of these places of interest.

Oak Bluffs

Oak Bluffs is known as the gingerbread house capital of the world. This is misleading, as they rarely if ever sell gingerbread, and the little they sell could not possibly be enough to build a house. Rather, the style of housing prevalent in this town of deception resemble that of gingerbread houses made in full scale. If compared to the more popular, edible gingerbread houses of our time, you will notice a definite lack of sugary fix-ins. In these houses, what should be delicious sugary treats are actually support beams, gutters and picture box windows. It looks like I called Oak Bluffs on their "Bluff." Get it? "BLUFF?!"

Did you know... that more fat kids die of internal splinters in Martha's Vineyard within a single day than anywhere else in the world?

Gay Head
This up-island town features beautiful cliffs that have been designated a national landmark! On top of that, this land is still owned by the Indian tribe who inhabited the town before we went all Manifest Destiny on their asses. Gay Head is also home to one of five very decorated lighthouses throughout Martha's Vineyard. It is getting increasingly hard to not address the origins of the towns name, so I will just say this: You know how Native American's would get their name after something observed in the immediate environment?

Beaches
As an island, Martha's Vineyard is actually bordered by a series of beaches. If beaches are your thing, you should probably look into Martha's Vineyard and islands in general.

Edgartown

Edgartown was built in the 18th and early 19th centuries as the center of a thriving whaling industry. Most of the town's structures and roads were built on blubber, both as a export and as a physical material. The church Edgartown is built around is called the "Whaling Church," largely because the prosperity that whaling has brought the community made it clear to the citizens that there was no god, only man and a giant whale who will only give them a bountiful hunt in exchange of virgin blood. Edgartown is named after the pioneer of the land, Leonard Town.

Artists interpretation of our lord, swimming merrily in virgin blood.