Info Nuggest: Secret Menu Items

In any respectable franchise restaurant, there is the menu that laid before the public's eye that is suppose to represent all possible items open for consumption. But some items are too... obscure to revealed to the public eye. Some meals are more... avant garde compared to what the regular consumer is use to. Some food stuffs are simply... ball-bursting to even be imagined by the regular clientele of a Sonic Burger or TGI Friday's. How do I discover these exotic tastes? How do I order such an item without getting a weird look? How delicious do these forbidden fruit taste?

Mr. Jones and I have scoured the most renown and most common restaurants across America and purposely asked for items not seen on the menu. When ordering these meals, we made sure to lean in and shift our eyes from side to side to make sure they knew we were in on the secret menu scandal. When we completely hit a hidden menu item, the clerk immediately knew what we were talking about and proceeded to make the best meals imaginable. The following are restaurants that feature menu items you never knew existed.

Taco Bell
Chefs will make whatever you request as long as they have the proper ingredients. Also, since the customer is always right, they have no choice but to follow your order. Do want your meat all hot and cooked? Just order him to take it from the freezer. Want your lettuce to be marinated in Taco Bell's exclusive Mountain Dew Baha Blast? They'll take it straight from the syrup. Want your quesdilla to be filled money from that water-filled donation cylinder? Those orphans rely too much on polio vaccines, anyway. It's Taco Bell. Think outside the reasonable.

Sonic
If asked, male cashiers are trained to dip their balls in your specialty fruit drinks upon request. This dates back to when Sonic first opened in 1910, where they were the first restaurant to offer the influential and often imitated nutshake.

Jack-In-the-Box
If you ask for a E. Coli Burger, it is store policy for the Jack-in-the-Box mascot, Jack, to punch you in the nards for being a smartass. If he is not available, the manager takes over nard-punching duties, as detailed in computer training lesson 3.6, "E. Coli: Who fucking said it?"

Did you know... that his 5 'o clock meeting takes place all up in your grill?

KFC
It is corporate policy for KFC to liquefy any item on the menu per customer request. Limit 5 liquid items per order.

Krispy Kreme
By simply asking for the glaze cup, you receive a travel-style coffee cup of Krispy Kreme's patented glaze for your consumption. This can either be drank from the cup, or you can pour it over any other food during your day. For larger sizes, customers have to sign waivers to not sue in case of heart explosion or artery fires.

Jamba Juice
Jamba Juice is most well-known for it's health drinks and boosters, so some menu items are hidden to keep up with their concentration on drinks that are good for you. However, your juice batista will know what you need when you ask for such drink flavors like Chocolate, Bacon, and Chocobacon.

Burger King
Ask for the Nugget Burger, and you will receive a standard Whopper, but with all the ground beef replaced with chicken fries. If they disagree, just order a Whopper and an order of chicken fries. It might be messy, but it's so worth it. Also, hamburger patties make an unidentifiable sound when they are thrown in protest against the brick BK walls.

Hooters
Ask your waitress for the non-diarrhea inducing wings.

Pizza Hut
With their mission statement of putting cheese in places most unfathomable, you can ask for any menu item to be filled with mozzarella cheese. This include drinks, in which the rim of your glass is filled with pipping hot cheese, accompanied with shots of marinara.

Wendy's
A former imitator of Sonic's drinks, Frostys can be turned into nutshakes at a reasonable price with a nutatoe for only 50 cents more.